Whilst flipping through the channels I stopped upon a commercial for the new film Surrogates by Bruce Willis and thought to myself “damn, how many more times can this guy save the world?”. He’s already saved us from countless terrorist attacks, prevented 99% of the world’s population from a deadly disease and rescued Ving Rhames from a fate worse than death. What does he ask in return? A medal? A thank you from the President? No. He just wants to bang Demi Moore and be left alone. Then, when some talent-less hack ends up with his wife does he go crazy? No, he’s OK with it because he’s just that fucking cool. Next time you’re out in the country gazing up at all the beautiful stars think of Bruce Willis and the giant meteor that ISN’T heading straight for you.