March 30, 2011


Yea right, I wish.
After re-reading my last post I realized it would be rather hypocritical of me to talk about how women should strive to be less crazy without confessing my own brand of cyclical craziness. This is going to make me sound like a hippie d-bag but I've learned over the years that my mind and body are very in tune with the seasons. As the weather gets colder I tend to withdraw into myself, simplify my life, become less social and focus on more cerebral pursuits. At least that's what I tell myself, in reality it just means more blogging.

Once things start warming up I tend to become extremely restless and look for ways to complicate my life. Usually when I start adding complexity I do it obsessively. One summer I found a bright yellow girls bike from K-Mart in my parents garage and rode it 20-30 miles a day until it fell apart on me. Last year I turned my car into a lowrider, tried my hand at announcing a few semi-professional sporting events and dated an older woman who had children close enough to my age to make it feel awkward. Those were all interesting experiences and I don't regret doing them, mostly.

Generally though, my addictive personality gets me into more troubling habits. Drinking excessive amounts of alcohol, abusing various substances and finding myself an intelligent, fragile, and troubled young woman are pretty standard hobbies for me during the summer months. Since I've been encouraging women to face down TCCS head-on I figured I should do the same with my own issues.

Since the only drugs still left out there to explore are the scary needle ones and figuring out when a complicated woman will enter my life is nearly impossible, I've decided to be proactive and find other new, less harmful ways, to complicate things for myself this summer. Unfortunately, there isn't much information out there on the interwebs that teaches you how to complicate your life. Apparently everyone wants less complicated lives for some reason. I did find a list of things I could do to uncomplicate my  life and tomorrow I'll take a look and see if doing the opposite of what that list tells me would do any good.

Until then, I'd love to hear what complicates your life for the better or the worse. That and any obsessions you have that I might be interested in copying.

Image taken from here:


  1. I am an obsession free person. Can you believe that? I think blogging is my only vice. And it just doesn't get lamer than that. I am a troubled one is that I am scared of the world. Not really, but it is a good excuse to not do anything.

  2. Drinking use to be my favourite vice... But I sorta gave that up - or at least stopped doing that as much... but I probably need a new obsession... so yeah, I could always join a cult... I hear this protestant thing is finally catching on - And if I ever want to start drinking again, I could always become Catholic.

  3. I'm not really fixated on anything right now. Maybe weight-lifting? But I only do that two or three times a week, so that can't qualify as an obsession. I like sex too, but ditto on the two or three times a week thing there too. I'm getting pretty hooked on my new WaterPik. You could try that.

  4. I'm the same way with my moods and the seasons. I'm always so much happier in the summer, and more restless. In the winter I'm bitter and want to be left alone to read and smoke ganj at my leisure. Blogging and watching reality TV are two favorite obsessions of mine. Maybe start watching Real Housewives and live through their drama vicariously. That's what I do!

  5. thank you for the admission on the first part, sweet pea, i was going to ignore it until you wrote something like this talking about the crazies that boys get as well :)

    i try to simplify as much as i can on the things i can control because i know i'm complex enough as it is! some have told me my blog personality doesn't match my in-person personality because i unload a lot of serious stuff on my blog, and yet with my friends i'm pretty happy go lucky and laugh a lot, but hey that's why we remember that everyone has a million facets, everyone can be whoever they choose to be (to a point).

    i am, however, pretty religious about watching dancing with the stars on monday nights. unless a cute boy asks me out, but traditionally monday night isn't a meow night for me, hehe.

  6. I live in an open marriage, and I think my obsession is letting my relationships get too close. You're supposed to be casual and my wife is good at cutting thiing when they get to close, but for some reason, I have a problem doing the same thing. I like the bond, and at times, I let it become a bit too much.

  7. well maybe you could take up macrame on acid or join a Dungeons and Dragons club

  8. Summer Chris sounds like he could be my BFF! Lol. Too bad I don't live in Chicago. ;)

    Summer is a perfect season for complicating one's life. Something about the hot weather and long days changes a person, I think.

    Actually now that I think about it, summer is the season I seem to get in most trouble. I normally find ways to complicate my life by drinking a bit of champagne and then going outside to see where life takes me...

  9. Learn to knit socks. Once you start you'll be spending at least half your weekly paycheck on wool, like every single fucking sock knitter in the NEV Squad.

    Crochet looks a lot more transportable and more versatile, however. Bruno is making himself some "Glittnes" for when he has to work in the Frozen Foods walk-in freezer.

    Winter Chris sounds like he has mild SADD. Get a tropical aquarium and hang out by the sun box.


    Or teach yourself Diabolo, Meteor, juggling ro devilsticks. Those are plenty fucking complicated and will entertain you and others for hours.

    My currently favored method for complicating my life is to NOT study or go to class in the last year of my degree. Yay! XD It's a bit more expensive than other options, but totally effective!

  10. Great post.

    Well, you know all about my vices - and I am happy to say they are in the past. No needles for me either, but everything else was fair game.

    Now, I think the only thing that's complicating my life is that pesky little inner voice in my head that tells me I "CAN'T" - I need to kick her a*s.

  11. I'm addicted to flossing my teeth. i am also addicted to pretty much everything. Complications are fun. Why would you want your life to be less fun?

  12. How about 6th grade projects that keep you up until midnight?
    TA DA--Chrisopher! Your very first book!: "How To Complicate Your Life". I don't think I've seen that title out there... never underestimate the number of people who want to know how to fuck up their lives.
    Oh, and intelligent, fragile, and troubled young woman?--proceed with caution. ;)

  13. I think you already read it on my blog, but I am so obsessed with being with myself, it is just too comfortable, but I know how it can be a bitch when you really want to look for someone to enter your life.

  14. If you're tired of waiting for someone to come along, there's always the trusty "mail-order bride option." Had a buddy who actually did that...turns out some women don't take it well if you don't follow through with the marriage license. There was a fair amount of trickery involved in getting her back into Thailand alone and without her green card. True. Btw, I'm in Chicago too. What neighborhood you in?

  15. The easiest way to complicate your life is never to say anything but yes to any request.

  16. I second knitting or crocheting. In my experience, crochet is easier.

    I also second an aquarium. They can be as simple or as complicated as you want them to be! If you get live plants and hard-to-keep fish, you'll be so good at chemistry by the time you're done that you might as well get a degree in it.

    I have a garden to complicate my life. 90% edible plants, with a couple thrown in for good looks. You don't know what delicious is until you've eaten vegetables you grew yourself. And depending on the veggies you pick, it can get pretty complicated.


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