Now don't get me wrong, I love them very much, but after spending about an hour with them I started to realize why my dad and aunt are suddenly so busy. Old people are crabby as hell. They really are like children, if you take them out and they start getting tired they get crabby and start pitching fits. The only difference is I've got no problem scolding a kid when they start acting like a brat, scolding my elderly grandparents though? I'd look like a monster to anyone within earshot. I've decided to just ignore them and read my book. If they want to yell at each other and cause a scene that's their business. The main reason they argue is that they can't hear each other at all. For example, my grandpa was filling out the medical forms for my grandma. He was asking her what the symptoms of her various allergies were. They went through most of them without any trouble but when they got to diarrhea they suddenly couldn't hear each other. This of course led to my grandma yelling "diarrhea! diarrhea! diarrhea!" as loud as she could in the crowded doctors office. I kept reading Oscar Wilde.
They're also very different people and while they both have characteristics I admire, they're personalities can also lead to conflict. My grandpa is a conservative former insurance salesman and my grandma is a free-spirited, classically trained artist. Last week I had to take them to Sears after their doctors appointment so my Grandpa could order a new pair of glasses before the sale they were running expired. They both use walkers at this point and getting them both where they need to go is always a challenge. As we're walking through Sears at a snails pace, my grandma suddenly spots some quilt on the other side of the store whose texture and design for some reason or another really inspired her. Somehow she all of a sudden gets that walker going at the speed of light and darts off in that direction. My grandpa absolutely cannot move fast at all and needs to rest periodically in the store so I'm walking down the center aisle chasing my grandma while my grandpa is behind me screaming "Juanita! Juanita! Dammit! Wait for me! Glenn! Jonathon! I mean, Chris! Grab her!". I seriously think he half expected me to go tackle her and make her wait for him. At that point I decided it was just best to let her go wander off and get my grandpa to the vision center. I dumped my crabby grandpa off on the unsuspecting optometrist and went to go find where my grandma had run off to. It took me a half hour to find her. I never realized how big Sears stores were until that day. Eventually I broke down and started asking random Sears employees if they'd seen an old lady with a walker anywhere. One of them told me they saw one head for the bathrooms so I went there and waited, like some sort of creep, next to the ladies room for about ten minutes. Eventually she came out and said "There you are! I've been looking all over for you!". I rolled my eyes and led her back to where my grandpa was.
I wonder what sort of adventures we'll get into today. I seriously want to find a couple of those leashes that some parents put on their toddlers.
Image taken from: http://americanthings.wordpress.com/2009/11/04/film-driving-miss-daisy/