2. When I was in seventh grade I would write "Jacqueline" on the palm of my hand nearly everyday in an effort to build up the courage to finally ask her out. I never did. Three years ago I bumped into her and she asked me out. I said no. People change.
3. I'm in a polyamorous relationship with an adorable sociology student named Karen and a Salvadorian man we affectionately call Dali.
4. I made a pitcher of Kool-Aid last night because I had no flavored beverages on hand (unless you count tequila) and I wasn't in the mood for water. It was awesome! Why don't people still drink Kool-Aid? I can't remember the last time I was at someone's house and they asked if I wanted a glass of Kool-Aid. Or is it that people just stop asking you if you want Kool-Aid when you're older than age 10?
5. The above statement wasn't entirely true. I didn't make Kool-Aid, I made the generic equivalent. We always had the generic stuff when I was a kid and now I have a taste for it. I could afford Kraft Mac-N-Cheese if I really wanted it, but the stuff from Aldi's just tastes better to me.
6. The above statement wasn't entirely true either. At this point I doubt I could really afford Kraft Mac-N-Cheese. I was just trying to make a point.
7. Number one is a lie. However, most people lose interest in lists by this point and I can't wait to see how many people ask "who the hell doesn't know how to ride a bike?". I find great humor in bizarre lies that people believe just based on the absurdity of the claim and firmness with which it was delivered. People always say "you can't make stuff like that up". You can, I do it all the time. So yes, obviously I know how to ride a bike. In fact, Karen, Dali and I have a beautiful three person bike we take on day trips. I like to be in the middle.
Image taken from here: http://humor.gunaxin.com/15-mia-kool-aid-flavors/19821